Rich Zeroth

Rich Zeroth pays his bills by day working at an online publishing company & pursues more creative endeavors on nights & weekends, e.g., stand-up comedy, blogging on the interwebs, and tweeting about owning a mismanaged zoo. His one-man show about faking sick 127 consecutive days of school in 5th grade, titled “Swollen Head”, won the 2005 ECNY (Emerging Comics of New York) Award for best one-person show, and is currently being adapted into a screenplay. He lives with his wife, daughter, and dog in Brooklyn, NY. A complete list of Rich's pieces on Revolving Floor can be found here.

Full Week
The Initiation of the Termination

Order SleepWell over the counter, INT. DINER – MORNING

LARRY (48, unkempt, wearing an old, beat up coat with mismatched hat and scarf) enters, buy SleepWell online no prescription, quickly scans the room, and takes a seat in an empty booth. He lifts the menu in front of his face, Buy generic SleepWell, engrossed.

FRANK (33, handsome and confident, wearing designer winter attire that’s two sizes too big) enters. He stands just inside the door, australia, uk, us, usa, scanning the room, referring to an unfolded piece of paper. After a moment he notices LARRY and the empty seat across from him, order SleepWell over the counter. He approached the booth, Where can i order SleepWell without prescription, removes his jacket, and has just begun to slide into the seat when the WAITRESS approaches.

LARRY: Chicken cacciatore and a bowl of clam chowder.

WAITRESS: And for you.

FRANK: (still shifting in his seat, buy SleepWell without prescription, getting comfortable) Coffee, black, and a blueberry muffin. Order SleepWell over the counter, Thanks. Order SleepWell from mexican pharmacy, WAITRESS: You got it.

[WAITRESS leaves]

FRANK: So. . . I obviously got your note, order SleepWell over the counter. Mind telling me what I’m doing here, purchase SleepWell online no prescription.

LARRY: (lowering his menu) What are you doing here. . . Order SleepWell over the counter, What are you. Order SleepWell online overnight delivery no prescription, . . doing here. . , order SleepWell over the counter. Stupendous choice of words, rx free SleepWell. Brilliant, really. For a man who is so good at finding lost items he didn’t even lose it seems a bit contradictory that you find yourself lost as well. SleepWell from canadian pharmacy, FRANK: With all due respect, I’m not the one who ordered Italian food and a bowl of clam soup for breakfast. Order SleepWell over the counter, Look, I’m a busy man-

LARRY: Of course you are. I brought you here today because I know what you are up to. I got my first whiff of you last month. My take from the Harold Street Cineplex was about half of what it usually is, buy SleepWell from mexico. For a Sunday first showing I should’ve been able to claim at least three wallets, two purses, and a pair of reading glasses but all I walked out of there with was an umbrella and a kid’s book bag full of Spanish homework. I shouldn’t need to tell you that claiming lost items that aren’t yours is hard enough, working with a depleted inventory makes it that much more difficult, order SleepWell over the counter. Online buy SleepWell without a prescription, FRANK: So you’re afraid of a little competition. Worried that there aren’t enough forgotten sunglasses in this town for the both of us.

LARRY: Just thought we could make things easier for both of us with a few simple ground rules. So seeing as I don’t know your address or phone number let alone your name, I had to arrange a meeting, order SleepWell from United States pharmacy. Order SleepWell over the counter, FRANK: (pulls out the note and sets it on the table). Pretty slick.

LARRY: Yeah. Last week I dropped three dozens black wallets just like the one you found filled with nothing but newspaper clippings throughout all the joints I’ve seen a major drop off in merchandise. Where to buy SleepWell, The Mikan Street Y, the mini mall on Barber Street, the train station, you name it. Each wallet had the same note shoved inside, order SleepWell over the counter. I figured if there really was some new hotshot beating me to the punch to the lost and found bins and if he was anything close to resembling a worthwhile adversary one of these wallets would eventually end up in his hands, canada, mexico, india. Didn’t take you long. Which one you pick up.

FRANK: (tossing wallet on the table) I happened across this fine leather number at the airport information desk. Order SleepWell over the counter, LARRY: Terminal A. SleepWell price, coupon, FRANK: C.

LARRY & FRANK: (together) Clarice.

[caption id="attachment_1819" align="alignnone" width="274" caption="Clarice"][/caption]

LARRY: Ha ha ha. Sweet gal. Fortunately she doesn’t take much pride in her work, order SleepWell over the counter.

FRANK: True, purchase SleepWell. I’ve managed to claim six laptops, three coats, and a mountain bike without so much as a follow up question from the dear girl. SleepWell for sale, LARRY: She’s handed me 57 cell phone chargers.

FRANK: May I ask what you do with 57 cell phone chargers. Order SleepWell over the counter, LARRY: (flicking an errant crumb of blueberry muffin off the Formica table) I’ve got guys. You need guys. Shouldn’t have to tell you that. My cell phone charger guy thinks if he gathers enough chargers he can somehow put Verizon out of business, where can i buy cheapest SleepWell online. Stems from an as yet unresolved disputed cell phone bill from what I understand.

FRANK: You should try checking out online hoarding support groups, order SleepWell over the counter. Whenever I find myself with a surplus of slightly stained sweaters or technologically obsolete handheld devices I infiltrate hoarding chat rooms and easily unload stuff at an albeit below market value but still profitable rate. Most times they’ll come pick it up too so that saves on shipping costs and travel time. Buy SleepWell from canada, They also don’t have problems buying in bulk. Of course that’s only for items that retail for under $100. Order SleepWell over the counter, Everything else I put on EBay under a number of highly rated but untraceable accounts and sell as refurbished at 15% below retail.

LARRY: Bah. Too complicated. I’ve got a guy who makes sculptures out of keys, order SleepWell online c.o.d. He pays me 10 cents for every gold key, 15 cents for every sliver key, and 25 cents for any key bigger than the standard door key. Seeing as the average key chain contains to less than 5 keys I can usually get 75 cents easy per set of keys, order SleepWell over the counter. Order SleepWell no prescription, There are five subway stations, two libraries, a sports stadium, three shopping centers, and a couple dozen restaurants within a ten-minute walking distance of my apartment, real brand SleepWell online. That means in one hour I can typically collect over $8 worth of merchandise. That’s higher than minimum wage my friend. Just in keys. Order SleepWell over the counter, [Beat as WAITRESS returns]

WAITRESS: Excuse me sir. Japan, craiglist, ebay, overseas, paypal, We don’t currently have chicken cacciatore or clam chowder. Is there something else I could get you.

[caption id="attachment_1820" align="alignnone" width="500" caption="60 Cents"][/caption]

LARRY: Both items were clearly listed on the menu.

WAITRES: I’m sorry about that. Can I offer you a cup of coffee on the house, order SleepWell over the counter.

LARRY: Sure, buy SleepWell without a prescription. Thanks.

WAITRESS: Anything else.

LARRY: Just the free coffee. Order SleepWell over the counter, [WAITRESS leaves]

FRANK: I see your propensity to get something for nothing doesn’t end at conning bin masters. SleepWell samples, LARRY: Ha. It’s not about the con. It’s about getting what and as much as you need for nothing through whatever means necessary while minimizing the amount of unhappiness spread as a direct result.

FRANK: (sarcastically) Right. A sort of utilitarian who lies about lost stocking caps and can’t afford a cup of coffee, order SleepWell over the counter. Give me a break, online buy SleepWell without a prescription.

LARRY: Now you’re getting the idea. But why stop at lying. If the stocking cap can’t be obtained through standard ‘describe and claim’ processes then it shall be taken by force. Order SleepWell over the counter, FRANK: Rob the lost and found bins. Buy no prescription SleepWell online, LARRY: Sure.

FRANK: Where.

LARRY: Wherever. Bars, restaurants, where can i find SleepWell online, rental car centers.

FRANK: That’s crazy, order SleepWell over the counter. If you’re going to resort to robbing the lost and found bins why not just rob the cash registers why you’re at it.

[LARRY gives a broad smile before taking a long, Rx free SleepWell, exaggerated sip of coffee]

LARRY: There lies the difference between you and I. It’s not about cash or laptops or items that retail for over $100. It’s about obtaining wayward objects and either utilizing them myself or distributing them to others in a manner that results in a greater good. Order SleepWell over the counter, Take the chicken cacciatore and clam chowder. Placing a claim on those lost menu items may very well result in the kitchen manager placing an order for marinara sauce and oyster crackers thereby decreasing the chances of a future patron finding themselves disappointed in the inaccurate menu. All I ask for in return is a cup of coffee, buying SleepWell online over the counter.

FRANK: Well if we’re so different than why am I sitting across from you. I mean, you said yourself that because of my sudden rise in the ranks you’re working with a depleted inventory. If I’m claiming laptops and you’re claiming car keys there shouldn’t be a problem, order SleepWell over the counter. Ordering SleepWell online, LARRY: I wasn’t certain until a minute ago but I think it’s the purses and wallets. You target them for the cash and credit cards and the like. I target them for the bus passes, business cards, and chewing gum, kjøpe SleepWell på nett, köpa SleepWell online.

FRANK: So how you want to do this. Order SleepWell over the counter, I get purses and you get wallets. Vice versa.

LARRY: I have a better idea. SleepWell for sale, Whoever successfully obtains the purse or wallet first takes what they need and then leaves it in Terminal C where the other can claim what’s theirs with minimal resistance.

LARRY & FRANK: (together) Clarice.

FRANK: And I assume I continue to get dibs on electronics, designer clothing and bags, and jewelry, order SleepWell over the counter.

LARRY: And I retain rights to hats, scarves, umbrellas, online buying SleepWell hcl, pipes and other such accessories, writing utensils, stuffed animals, weapons, personal hygiene items, trinkets, books, day planners, and journals.

[WAITRESS returns]

WAITRESS: So how is everything tasting. Can I get you more coffee.

FRANK: No thank you. Order SleepWell over the counter, I think we’re ready for the check.

WAITRESS: I’ll be right back with that.

LARRY: Excuse me, Miss. Do you happen to have a lost and found bin.

WAITRESS: We do. Did you leave something here, order SleepWell over the counter.

LARRY: My friend here thinks he may have left his wallet here a few days back.

WAITRESS: I can go back and take a look. What’s your name.

FRANK: (wondering what his counterpart is up to) It didn’t have any ID in it. Order SleepWell over the counter, It’s black, leather, and full of newspaper clippings.

WAITRESS: I’ll go take a look and come back with your check.

LARRY: Well, I’m going to hustle on out of here and let you settle the bill Mr. 15% below retail.

FRANK: Pleasure doing business with you. I’ll see you around, order SleepWell over the counter.

LARRY: (putting on his jacket) Doubt it.

[LARRY leaves]

WAITRESS: Here’s your check and I believe this might be yours.

FRANK: (taking the wallet) Great. Thanks. Order SleepWell over the counter, What a relief.

[FRANK opens the wallet to find, amongst the strips of paper, $4.89, the exact amount of the bill including a 15% tip, along with the following note]

[caption id="attachment_1821" align="alignnone" width="360" caption="The Note"][/caption]

Figured you to be the cup of coffee with a muffin sort. Most found folks are. Remember that the lost, while scattered about, often broken and dismissed, always outnumber the found. Also, never underestimate the man with dibs on the all the umbrellas and writing utensils.

Good luck in your endeavors. -L

-----

Key image by DistortedSmile

Read other pieces by Rich Zeroth.

View other pieces on the "Lost And Found" theme here.

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Comedy As Drama
From The Desk Of The I.C.C.I.
Assessment

The White Castle Incident: documented happenings leading up to

Joshua Pashman Buy Dostinex no prescription, , Coworker:

5:28 pm EST; Friday August 3, 2001

It had been a long week.  We’d just implemented a brand new online inventory reservation system and it didn’t work for shit.  Richard had sort of been in charge of the whole thing and was getting a lot of flack from sales and finance.  Word had even spread to the big wigs in corporate.  I remember asking him if he had any plans for the weekend and he said he would be drinking.  I started to laugh a little but stopped when I saw the look on his face.  It wasn’t about unwinding or having a good time.  It was about getting to a state of inebriation as fast as possible.  My guess was he was hitting up happy hour at “The Pourhouse”. Buy Dostinex no prescription, Cheap, stiff drinks with a pretty cute after-work clientele, ordering Dostinex online. Buy Dostinex without prescription, Kevin Lund, Friend:

8:27 pm EST; Friday August 3, Dostinex gel, ointment, cream, pill, spray, continuous-release, extended-release, Dostinex price, coupon, 2001

It was a little early for Jagermeister if you ask me but who am I to turn down a shot?  I could tell that Rich was already well on his way.  I asked him how long he’d been there and he laughed loudly and held his hands about two feet apart, whatever that meant.  I was meeting out some folks we both knew from school for dinner at 9:30 and asked if he wanted to come.  It was only a few blocks away.  He laughed again and said he that he didn’t have time to eat, australia, uk, us, usa, Order Dostinex from United States pharmacy, whatever that meant.

[caption id="attachment_833" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="Richard (right) and friend Kevin Lund on the night in question, order Dostinex online overnight delivery no prescription, Japan, craiglist, ebay, overseas, paypal, approximately 8:30pm."]Zeroth_at_bar[/caption]

Angela Fischer, Random Girl at Bar #1:

9:58 pm EST; Friday August 3, buy Dostinex online cod, Kjøpe Dostinex på nett, köpa Dostinex online, 2001

I was meeting up with some friends at “The Pourhouse” for a drink before we went to this new club called “Pulse”.  I’d been there for about 5 minutes when the bartender offers me a shot of something.  I told her that I didn’t order it and she said, “compliments of the gentleman at the end of the bar” and sort of rolled her eyes.  He was like totally staring at me and looked like a total creep.  His mouth was even hanging open a little.  Krissy suggested we go somewhere else before he tried actually talking to us.  We left before finishing our drinks, online buy Dostinex without a prescription. Fast shipping Dostinex, Stephanie Crutchfield, Random Girl at Bar #4:

11:21 pm EST; Friday August 3, Dostinex trusted pharmacy reviews, Order Dostinex no prescription, 2001

I was meeting up with some friends at “The Pourhouse” for a drink before we went to this hot club called “Lube”.  I’d been there for about 5 minutes when the bartender offers me a shot of something.  I told her that I didn’t order it and she said, “he did” and motioned to the end of the bar while kind of shaking her head.  Before I knew it this guy was like standing right next to me.  He said that there was a whole set of songs in the jukebox just for me and that they should be starting pretty soon – ten minutes tops.  Thank God Kelly stepped in and said Chad was waiting for us outside and we needed to get going.  We don’t even know anyone named Chad.  As I grabbed my purse he asked for my phone number but I pretended I didn’t hear him.  We left before finishing our drinks, buy Dostinex from mexico.

Camie Reynolds, Bartender, The Pourhouse:

2:22 am EST; Saturday August 4, 2001

At first he was all about buying girls shots.  When that didn’t work he tried martinis.  By the end of the night the offer was an order of chicken wings.  One girl actually took him up on that but by that time the kitchen was closed.  His tab was pushing $200.  I remember because he left without closing it.  His debit card is still here.  So is his bag, buy Dostinex no prescription. Where can i buy Dostinex online, LaShonda West, White Castle Cashier:

2:49 am EST; Saturday August 4, purchase Dostinex online no prescription, Where to buy Dostinex, 2001

He seemed confused by the menu.  He had a lot of questions.  Would I recommend the chicken rings or the onion rings?  If he ordered twelve burgers could he get half bacon cheeseburger, half double cheeseburger, where can i find Dostinex online, Dostinex from canadian pharmacy, and half chicken sandwiches. Did we have Mello Yello?  I suggested he try our 10-pack deal with 2 sides and 2 large drinks for $12.99.  He ordered our Crave Case, Dostinex over the counter, Rx free Dostinex, which is 20 burgers of your choice and 4 sides for $18.99.  He paid with a credit card.  He left the card here.

[caption id="attachment_832" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="The Crave Case"]The Crave Case[/caption]

Michael Beckerman, buy Dostinex without a prescription, Purchase Dostinex, Roommate:

2:56 am EST; Saturday August 4, 2001

I had gone out that night too but we were in the city at some hoity-toity joint in the meatpacking district, online buying Dostinex hcl. Comprar en línea Dostinex, comprar Dostinex baratos, I think it was called “Throb”. Buy Dostinex no prescription, Maybe “Taint”. Anyway I got home before Rich did, buy no prescription Dostinex online, Where to buy Dostinex, about 3 or so. I was starving but every place I tried calling was closed, canada, mexico, india. Dostinex for sale, I was scouring the fridge for something to shove in my face but all we had was some soft taco shells, mustard, purchase Dostinex online, Dostinex from canadian pharmacy, a package of Kraft singles, and some cottage cheese that had seen better days, real brand Dostinex online. Dostinex trusted pharmacy reviews, I was seriously considering whipping up some minute rice and melting cheese on top when he walks in with a whole case of White Castle burgers. Hallelujah, buy Dostinex no prescription.

Amid Shukrijmah, Taxi Driver:

3:28 am EST; Saturday August 4, 2001

His fare was $16.00. He only had $13.17. Not enough I said. He offered to pay difference with hamburger. Buy Dostinex no prescription, I tell him get the fuck out my cab. He leave cell phone in back seat.

Michael Beckerman, Roommate:

3:31 am EST; Saturday August 4, 2001

So I couldn’t be happier when he walked in. Like I said, I was starving. I asked him how his night was and he muttered something about the city being full of cock teases. He was already three burgers deep before I even had the chance to ask him for one, buy Dostinex no prescription. He told me to fuck off. I was like, “C’mon man. You can’t eat twenty burgers on your own.” He said, “Watch me.” I tried to snatch one out of the case and he literally slapped my hand. I called him a fatass and went back into the kitchen to start boiling water for my minute rice concoction. When I came back into the living room there was only a few burgers left but any hope I had that he’d offer me the leftovers were dashed when he tossed the rest into the trash, flicked me off, and went into his bedroom. I then proceeded to pass out on the couch watching ‘Everybody Loves Raymond.’

[caption id="attachment_896" align="alignnone" width="300" caption=""Any hope I had that he’d offer me the leftovers were dashed when he tossed the rest into the trash, flicked me off, and went into his bedroom." Michael Beckerman, Roommate"]"Any hope I had that he’d offer me the leftovers were dashed when tossed the rest into the trash, flicked me off, and went into his bedroom." Michael Beckerman, Roommate[/caption]

Michelle Childress, Roommate’s girlfriend:

9:13 am EST; Saturday August 4, 2001

My parents were in town and Mike and I were supposed to meet them for brunch at 10.  I’d been calling Mike on his cell since 8:30 but he wasn’t picking up.  I figured he was still passed out so I went over to his place to wake him up.  As soon as I walk into their apartment I could tell things must’ve gotten ugly the night before because it reeked of smoke.  Sure enough Mike is passed out on the couch with the TV blaring.  I go into the kitchen to see if there was something on fire and I see Rich, elbows deep in the trash can fishing out what appear to be White Castle burgers.  I ask him if something was burning and he says something about Mike leaving the stove on all night, burned rice, and ruining the “good pot”.  As he’s talking it becomes evident that he’s eating the burgers out of the trash.  He even offered me one.  I told him no thank you, that we were going out to brunch with my parents.  He said he couldn’t go.  I do not recall inviting him.

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Regrets

Buy Xalatan no prescription, If there was a bright side it was that he no longer worried about not getting any sleep. Buying Xalatan online over the counter, Not to say that peaceful slumber wasn’t needed.  No, he had to be in the office in exactly 3 ½ hours to turn on the phones lest Bill Dwyer happen to call and get the automated ‘call us back during business hours’ recording.  It’s just that once 5am rolls around the panic of facing the upcoming day in a zombie-like stupor subsides and in its place a calm wave of acceptance washes over.  Of course whatever sliver of consciousness that had been fretting over the clock now congealed with the rest of his mind in firing off questions of the most crucial kind – the kind that needed to be addressed if he were to ever be the man he wanted – the kind that had kept him from sleeping in the first place.  He shifted his stare from the clock to the books on his dresser and again the part him that demanded betterment bellowed, comprar en línea Xalatan, comprar Xalatan baratos. Order Xalatan online overnight delivery no prescription, “When will you finish The Brothers Karamazov?”

It was one of a formidable row of hefty books he intended to read but merely gathered dust behind a smattering of mismatched socks, junk mail, order Xalatan online c.o.d, Buy Xalatan from canada, and phone bills he meant to dispute.  The dresser they sat on had held his socks, underwear, order Xalatan no prescription, Where to buy Xalatan, t-shirts, and jeans since he was 7 years old, online buy Xalatan without a prescription. Buy cheap Xalatan, It was one of the few pieces of furniture that he had taken with him when he moved to New York eight years ago. At the time he didn't consider it the dresser - the only one he'd ever need, Xalatan trusted pharmacy reviews. It was merely supposed to serve as a transition dresser until he got a job, a bigger place, and splurged on a 'grown-up' version of walnut or rich mahogany or whatever proper adult dressers were made of, buy Xalatan no prescription. Canada, mexico, india, This one had three of the bottom four knobs gnawed off by the dog and doubled as a pseudo bookshelf / coffee table.

“At what point do you plan on buying some decent furniture?”

Resigned to the futileness of re-closing his eyes he now sat up and began to exit the bed, purchase Xalatan online, Buy generic Xalatan, making a half-hearted attempt not to wake his wife. Half-hearted not because he didn't respect her sleep, buy Xalatan online cod, Buy Xalatan without a prescription, but because the meager size of the bedroom was such that the bed was snug tight into the corner of the room. He had volunteered to take the side against two walls when they first moved in together four years ago, buy Xalatan online no prescription. Buy Xalatan no prescription, A strategic decision at the time seeing as she typically got out of bed before he did. Order Xalatan from United States pharmacy, But on nights (mornings) like this it was hard enough to crawl over his wife and out of bed without digging his knee into her leg let alone allowing her to continue her sleep undisturbed.

“How are you going to afford a bigger place?”

After a soft spoken 'sorry honey' in reply to an 'ouch' and a frustrated shift in position, Xalatan samples, Where can i order Xalatan without prescription, he had successfully disembarked from the bed. He made his way to the kitchen to get something to drink but not before nearly tripping over the dog who consistently found a way to somehow sleep in the bedroom, Xalatan over the counter, Where can i buy Xalatan online, kitchen, and nursery all at once, rx free Xalatan, Xalatan for sale, such was their seemingly incredible shrinking apartment.

“How can you tell if your dog is happy?”

The fridge offered no soda, buy Xalatan without prescription, Fast shipping Xalatan, Kool-Aid, or beer, japan, craiglist, ebay, overseas, paypal.  All of which would have served as functional beverage choices for a self-perceived tortured thirty-something awake at 4 in the morning, buy Xalatan no prescription. Where to buy Xalatan,  A container of grape juice, three quarters full, buy Xalatan online cod, Buy cheap Xalatan no rx, sat in the very back - boldly selected from the beverage aisle many months ago after reading a Men's Health article that said grape juice helped retain muscle mass after working out.  It served no such purpose now except to mock and remind him that

A: his free weights have sat in the backyard under a blue tarp as long as the juice sat in the fridge and

B: he hated grape juice, buy cheap Xalatan. Online buying Xalatan hcl, “How are you ever going to find time to exercise?”

[caption id="attachment_418" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="The beverage aisle, from which the aforementioned grape juice was selected."]The beverage isle, <b>order Xalatan from United States pharmacy</b>, <b>Where can i find Xalatan online</b>, from which the aforementioned grape juice was selected.[/caption]

The ceaseless self-interrogation continued as he filled a glass with tap water.  Just above the sink was a shelf that housed a number of cookbooks, Xalatan gel, ointment, cream, pill, spray, continuous-release, extended-release. Buy Xalatan no prescription,  He scanned the book's spines, as was his habit when waiting for the water to get cold or hot enough. Where can i buy Xalatan online,  Intercourses:  Delectable Delights for Lovers was the one that grabbed his attention during this particular sink session - a wedding gift of the unused variety.

“When will you ever have the opportunity to eat grilled figs drenched with honey of off your wife's naked body?”

Seated at the kitchen table he grabbed a celebrity magazine and flipped past the pages of the thin and rich people wearing sunglasses exiting Starbucks holding bran muffins to the crossword puzzle in the back.  If he could occupy his mind with more manageable problems such as ‘David Beckham married one of the _ _ _ _ _ Girls’ he hoped he might somehow quell the relentless, self-induced peppering.  Instead they began to mount in a fashion too rapid to address with confident stokes of a pen.

“Why are these magazines so popular?”

“How can you learn more about computers?”

“What are the rules to rugby?”

“Do your coworkers respect you?”

“How does phone sex work?”

“How can you be a better brother?”

“Where did the flavor bubblegum come from?”

“How will you get your kid into a decent nursery school?”

“Did Amanda Parker’s grandma really die the day before senior prom?”

“How will you ever pursue your dreams while supporting a family?”

“Where did you lose your baseball mitt back in 5th grade?”

“How can you reconnect with your parents?”

“Will you ever ride on a dolphin?”

“How can you keep up this front that you’re in control?”

As the steady onslaught grew a unified answer became apparent.  The sound of his own voice startled him.

“I don’t know.”

Just then his daughter began to cry. A more certain indicator that the new day had begun there could not be, buy Xalatan no prescription. He slowly closed the magazine and debated his next move. It occurred to him that not only did he not know the answers to the questions, he didn’t know whether to stay seated or stand.

Any capacity to make decisions had left him.  He couldn’t bear to face another question, make another choice.  Not a single one. No more.

His wife walked past him, already knee deep in the morning routine.  She opened the fridge and inadvertently delivered the final blow, speaking the day's first words.

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Fiction