The Topic At Hand: How Do You Like Your Eggs?

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[caption id="attachment_787" align="alignnone" width="206" caption="Sacra Conversazione (Holy Conversation) by Piero della Francesca (1472)"]Sacra Conversazione (Holy Conversation) by Piero della Francesca (1472)[/caption]

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The more I go in the future, the more it becomes fictional, “metanormal” and “paraphilosophical”. And it reminds me the reason why the theory of the origin of the universe was nicknamed Big Bang as a mockery to such a misconception. The biggest mystery becomes the biggest joke. And a giant laugh both comical and cosmical resonates in the emptiness and infinity of the universe. And an egg filled with antimatter rises at the horizon of our galaxy, the Milky Way™, like an ovoid floating in the void.

The egg is almost ready. The water is still boiling and the bubbles are still bubbling.

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    • Elaine

      Now I'll be distracted, for a considerable amount of time, with the mind-bending possibility of creating something that takes 639 years to perform. Without being John Cage.

    • Eric Eicher

      I find this essay fascinating in many ways. I especially like the Spoiler's comical (but understandable) assumption that readers will undoubtedly be Amerocentric enough to need to be walked back from thinking that any city named “Paris” must, of course, be one of the surprising number of relatively small cities named Paris in the US (there are, for whatever weird amalgam of reasons, at least half a dozen more of those than Alessandro mentions) and can reasonably be expected to recognize the reality of Paris, France only by reference to the uncanny toyland version of same conjured by Walt Disney. Numerous striking references to Disney, cartoons, and related modes of unreality riddle the piece, my favorite being year 8763's alarming discovery by a then-unfrozen Walt that cartoons and reality have somehow literally become one (surely a nightmare scenario for Disney, who thrived on keeping the two world's separate enough to be readily distinguishable playmates, but not exactly great news for any of us, despite our current world's seemingly unstoppable rush to cartoonize itself as quickly as possible). The writing here has a kind of prose poem quality at many junctures, which resonates in interesting ways with the absurdist nature of much of the humor here. I've read this piece multiple times now and keep finding my mind returning to it, even as I work on other things; it's an amazing piece of work.

    • i don't think, therefore i am
      breaks my heart a little
      don't know why

    • I imagine that, once space travel becomes popular, there will be a database of Lines Spoken Upon Landing, with various explorers arguing over who had made the best and earliest use of which famous quotes in that regard. Dibs on “something wicked this way comes.”

    • Almost lost me with “anal and genital united” but I luckily kept reading and (after reading it 3 more times) found it to be my favorite post thus far.

      If only I could find a way to stick around until 2214 and celebrate the meager size of the universe.

      Also what's the name of the hermaphrodite bisexual robot offspring? I need to know that baby's name.

      I also now have a strong desire to write something categorized as “speculation”.

    • Tara

      This is so fun. Although I think the estimate for a First Nations pope is wildly optimistic. Maybe a Quebecker could take care of that though.

      I'm not a robot!!

      I don't eat eggs much but I think I'll try to remember to make at least one crazy speculation every time I handle one. As a spiritual practice, it could honor the chicken, the egg, and my crazy hope for the possibility of one day something new(ish) under the sun.

    The Author

    Alessandro Mercuri

    Alessandro Mercuri, born in 1973, studied philosophy in France and cinema in the United States at Calarts (M.F.A. in live action). He directed the documentary Alien American (2001), portrait of a woman claiming to come from outer space. Film critic Holly Willis in L.A. Weekly said : « Mercuri likes to assert that the video is neither a “fake documentary nor a real fiction”, which neatly summarizes the project’s unsettling view of the dichotomy between the real world and its multiple representations. » He now lives in Paris and works as a creative writer for the communication and film industry. He published in 2008 at the Editions Léo Scheer a literary essay, entitled Kafka Cola sans pitié ni sucre ajouté (without pity nor added sugar). French novellist and art critic Philippe Sollers, wrote in the press : « Who is Alessandro Mercuri ? I do not know. Nevertheless, he just wrote a sparkling little book. Kafka Cola, variations inspired by the famous sentence of former boss of TF1 (French TV channel) : “What we sell to Coca-Cola is available human brain time” What is this new brain substance and where will it lead us ? You’ll see.» // Here's the film version of Kafka Cola.

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